Interest in Prince Harry’s relationship with Prince William has filled thousands of news articles, documentaries, books, podcasts and social media posts since they publicly split their private offices in 2019 amid speculation of a royal rift.
Harry confirmed the strained relations between the brothers after he split from the monarchy with Meghan Markle in 2020, citing an unsupportive atmosphere within the royal family, hostility within the royal household and abuse from the British tabloid press.
In January 2023, the prince provided a raw and surprising account of just how deep the seed of discord ran with William through his memoir, Spare. He told readers that not only had the pair come close to estrangement but that they had never been as close as the public had been led to believe since the tragic death of their mother in 1997.
In Spare and in interviews surrounding its publication, Harry repeated his grievance that during the formative year after Princess Diana’s death, when he joined Eton College, William hurt him by telling him to act as if they didn’t know each other.
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William did not publicly respond to Harry’s claims in Spare or the promotional material surrounding its release.
Here, Newsweek looks at what Prince Harry has said about William’s school-days shunning in his memoir and interviews, so far.
‘Spare’ Revelations
Prince Harry used Spare to present his side of his life’s events, expressing his belief that until now, the media and palace had presented a distorted version to suit their own agendas.
Recounting the events of the year he started Eton College in 1998, he wrote that he was surprised that William behaved coldly to him coming so soon after the death of their mother.
“I was in way, way over my head,” he wrote of the transition starting at a senior level of schooling at the historic and large Eton campus.
“They’d [teachers] always say the same thing: ‘Don’t worry, you’ll be all right. And don’t forget you always have your brother here!’ But I wasn’t the one forgetting. Willy told me to pretend I didn’t know him.
“‘What?’
“‘You don’t know me, Harold. And I don’t know you.’
“For the last two years, he explained, Eton had been his sanctuary. No kid brother tagging along, pestering him with questions, pushing up on his social circle. He was forging his own life, and he wasn’t willing to give that up.”
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‘I Took That Personally’
Speaking to 60 Minutes host Anderson Cooper at the time of Spare‘s release, Harry elaborated on his brother’s school snubbing and how it affected him.
“At the time, it hurt. I couldn’t make sense of it,” Harry said.
“I was like, ‘What do you mean? We’re now at the same school. Like, I haven’t seen you for ages; now we get to hang out together.’
“He’s like, ‘No, no, no, when we’re at school, we don’t know each other.’ And I took that personally.”
Cooper highlighted that the situation was one of the different ways the brothers seemed to respond to their mother’s death.
“You’re absolutely right. You hit the nail on the head,” Harry said. “Like, we had a very similar traumatic experience, and then we dealt with it two very different ways.”
‘I Get How Irritating A Younger Sibling Can Be’
Harry added new insight in another Spare interview, this time with British broadcaster Tom Bradby. He reflected on his brother’s actions now that he has seen the sibling dynamic develop in his own children, Prince Archie and Princess Lilibet.
“I talk about the relationship between William and myself at Eton. And the fact that he didn’t really want to know me, and you know, as the younger brother, that sucks,” he told Bradby.
“It’s like, ‘Come on, like you left me at Ludgrove, and now I’m here at Eton, like hey, now we’re at the same school, let’s go.’ And he didn’t want anything to do with me. And that hurt at the time.
“But now, well, the gap between me and William is very similar to Archie and Lili, and to see Lili obsessed with Archie and Archie’s like ‘No, no Lili, I need my space, I need my space;’ now I get it. I get how irritating the younger sibling can be to the older sibling. But in the moment, at the time, I didn’t really grasp that, I didn’t really realize it, but yes, I’ve always loved my brother.”
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Prince William’s Reaction
Spare is not the first time Harry has revealed his relationship with William at school. The prince hinted at it in a 2017 documentary about Princess Diana titled Diana, Our Mother: Her Life and Legacy.
Here, the subject was raised in a joking way, but it provides a rare example where William’s response to one of his brother’s complaints about their relationship is recorded.
“That’s our first day at school,” William said as the brothers looked through a book of photographs Diana took during their childhood.
“Probably my first day,” Harry said. “Me turning up thinking ‘I’ve got my older brother at the school, he’ll be looking after me.’ When, in fact, you just ignored me.”
In response, both brothers laughed before moving on to discuss another photo.
James Crawford-Smith is Newsweek‘s royal reporter, based in London. You can find him on X (formerly Twitter) at @jrcrawfordsmith and read his stories on Newsweek‘s The Royals Facebook page.
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